Here are some helpful guidelines to enable you to better find the location of cards when declaring the hand. This is part of my Novice to Intermediate Series. If you feel that you don't need it, ignore it.
1. If any opponent advertises length in any suit during the auction, he is the candidate to be most likely to be short in trump. Play accordingly.
2. Did anybody open the bidding? If so give him 12 hcps and total the three hands. How much can the other opponent have?
3. If an opponent has failed to open the bidding, then his hand is limited to 11 hcps. If he shows 10 or 11 hcps early in the play, then his partner probably has the rest.
4. If an opponent has failed to respond to an opening bid by partner, his hand is severely limited.
5. If one opponent overcalls and his partner fails to raise to the 2 level, assume he does not have 3 card support. Now count the cards in that suit.
6. If one opponent makes a take out double, your partner makes a response e and the other opponent does not respond to the double, assume that opponent has less than 6 hcps. In other words, opponents hcps are least divided 2:1 favoring the take out doubler. If you are looking for any key card put it in take out doubler’s hand.
Analyzing the Opening Lead Suit Contracts
1. Small card lead. This should show that the lead is either from some honor in the suit or it will be a lead from 3 or more small cards. Strong players are more likely to lead small from an honor. You can ask what they lead from 3 or 4 small cards, since they are required to mark the opening lead portion of the convention card if they lead top of nothing.
2. Medium sized card. If you can see several of the honors in the suit, it probably is a doubleton. If he has a doubleton, play him to be long in any other suit in which you have an interest. It is also a signal to get the trump out if there is nothing else you need to do first. It could also be a singleton. If the bidding has both sides competitively involved at high levels that is evidence of highly distributional hands all around the table. Watch out for short suit leads.
3. Lead of Ace. Check the convention card to see if they lead Ace from Ace King. It must be marked on the "leads" portion of the card. If they lead King from Ace King, then the lead of the King guarantees either the Ace or Queen of that suit.
4. The lead of a Q, J or 10, shows the honor directly below it. If it is a J or 10, it could be an interior sequence (e.g. Q109x, KJ10x). In a suit contract only good players will make an aggressive lead from a tenace in a suit not bid by partner. No trump leads are different.
5. Good players rarely lead an unsupported Ace in a game level contract. If it is a part score contract they very likely have the King, even if they don’t play it. If they don’t have the King, decorum dictates that you not say “Thank You.”
6. Good players do not underlead an Ace against suit contracts. Put the Ace in the other hand.
7. If the lead is a small card and you have KJx(x) on the board, put in the Jack, since the lead is likely from the Queen. (See above re under leading Aces). Likewise, if you have Q10, put in the 10, a good player is more likely to lead from a King that a Jack.
8. If an opponent makes a 2 suited bid and then is on lead, assume the card that he leads is a single if not one of the known suits.
9. If an opponents bid and raise a suit and then the original bidder lead a suit other than the one bid, assume it is a short suit lead.
No Trump Leads
1. In no trump, the standard is to lead from the top of 3+ small cards. A higher non-honor card (like the 9) usually means that he has nothing and is trying to find partner’s suit or that he doesn’t want to lead from his long suit (maybe our side already bid it). If Stayman has been used and opener has shown no major, many opponents will lead a major suit even if it is not 4 deep. Often they are hoping to catch partner with something in the major.
2. If the lead looks like 4th best, apply the rule of 11 to see how many higher cards the other opponent has in the suit. If he is marked with 3+ higher cards, he may have more in the suit than the opening leader, but cards may also be evenly distributed in numbers (4-4).
3. If you have a stopper and need to hold up in the suit to cut communication, subtract the total number of cards in your hand and dummy from 7 and hold up that number of times. So if we have 5 cards, they hold 8. We hold up twice and take the third lead of the suit. We have either severed communications in the suit (the cards were 5-3) or the cards were 4-4 and at most they can get three tricks in the suit.
4. If a low card is lead and you can see all of the other lower cards in the suit, then it is surely 4th best and you know he doesn’t have 5 cards in the suit. It is always reassuring to see a 2 on the opening lead.
5. If we open 1 no trump and an opponent makes an overcall and, on lead, does not lead his bid or indicated suit, it usually means that he has a suit headed by AQ or KJ and wants the lead in the suit to come from his partner through the no trump opener.
These are just some of the ways that you can play detective while you are declaring. There are no rules, just good guidelines to help you make better choices. If all this is too much to remember, just take a few key points that you can use and apply them. When you have that down, grab another guideline.
Feel free to send this to friends and partners and if they want to be on my mailing list, send me an e-mail address. If you print from my blog, be sure to select by dragging the cursor over the blog and print using the selection choice. Otherwise you will print multiple blogs. tommy
Friday, April 19, 2013
Sunday, December 23, 2012
Two Wrongs Often Make it Right
First the Weather Report in Rochester, New York. It snowed
and we have a clean blanket of snow covering the ground and more on
the way. I have forgotten all my Minnesota driving skills and so have
experienced going down the highways mostly sideways and out of control. Nobody
sent the scotch that I requested in my last post, but fortunately I brought my
little bridge flask along and have had plenty of table experiences that
challenged my resolve.
A couple of times I have discussed what I
believe to be the significant advantage of long term partnerships when it comes
to bidding bridge hands. Usually familiarity presents itself by precise bidding
and a little intuitive feeling about borderline situations that gives them an
edge. In spite of this, they occasionally get off track and you expect to
benefit by the unintended misunderstandings. Lately, however, just when it
looks like somebody is going to put a “top board” in my stocking, I end up with
a lump of coal. Here is an example from Friday (E-W vul):
A4
AKQ72AK4
942
KQ7654
T82
J
853J62 T983
KJ8 QT7
J7
T964Q75
A653
North and South are experienced players, not experts, but
know their way around the bridge table. After my 2 spade bid, North overcalls 3
hearts. Without hesitation her partner raises her to 4 hearts. When the South
hand comes down as dummy, Mike and I are trying to be stoic, but our eyes meet
and we are savoring what surely has to be a doomed contract and a high board
for us. Normally you would expect North to have 14-16 hcps for the 3 level
overcall so when South came down with 7 hcps it became clear that Santa was on
his way. At the conclusion of play as they wrapped their 4 heart contract, we sat
there like plucked geese knowing that we had been the victims of double
offsetting miscommunication. We hear South say “Well, I knew that her bid at the 3 level was highly invitational and I
did have 7 hcps.” North’s rejoinder was “Well, I was surely entitled to bid 3 hearts with 20 hcps. One
wrong compensated for another and our anticipated good board turned into an
average minus. If you hold the North hand, double first and then when South
bids 3 hearts, raise to 4 hearts. Now you are showing 17+ hcps and a game
invitational hand.
The next one catches one of my favorite rascals, Bill Foster,
and his longtime partner, Gayle Phillips, in a senior moment. They are
both Gold Life Masters and Gayle only plays with Bill. After a couple of false
starts, Bill is my nominee for this year’s “zero tolerance” award.
I see Bill and Gayle coming to my table, but I am loaded for
bear with one of my top partners, Lydia Fischer. Lydia celebrates her 90th
birthday today and is so close to 5,000 master points that every time we scratch I
expect diamonds to rain down from the sky. We play K-S by choice which totally
suits me since it is a system I play often. Here are the hands (N- S vul).
KJ7
QT52976
Q64
T986432 void
96 KJ87AK QT52
82 AJT93
AQ2
A43J843
K75
I am South and dealer and open 1NT (12-14). Gayle without
hesitation overcalls 2 spades!!! Lydia passes and without any tempo break
Bill passes. I have no rebid so I pass and we are in 2 spades. All of a
sudden Bill regains consciousness and realizes that he has passed an opening hand
equivalent with a void in the trump suit.
Bill does not take criticism all that well and Gayle can dish
it out when justified, so he goes on the offensive saying, “partner I know I
made a tragic mistake by passing, and please do me the favor of not commenting
about it in front of these nice people. It is not clear what Gayle’s 2 spade bid was all about, but given she claimed it
was preemptive and there was no conventional alert, it seems likely that she
did not notice my 1NT opening. The next thing I hear Gayle saying, “what
mistake, I made a weak bid of two of 2 spades, what did you want to do other
than pass?” Now Bill, always quick to grab the offensive and get off defense,
says “What weak 2 bid, you made a 2 spade overcall!” No one can go from guilt
to indignance quicker than Bill. It was a draw, so Gayle played the hand in two
spades with a ten high suit and a board void in trump. In spite of the
convoluted bidding and mutual miscues, they actually made 2 spades which was a
top score on the board, sharing it with 3 clubs. How did we fare? Well I did
not see diamonds descending from the sky. It was late in the day, and I did get
a chuckle seeing two very good players having super senior moments. Only Bill
Foster could come out of this smelling like a rose. I am sure that he reveled
with our frustration. If he has to stuff a lump of coal in someone’s stocking,
I’m sure that I would be one of his favorite candidates. Merry Christmas and happy New Year to all my readers.
Commentary to tommy@rochester.rr.com
Commentary to tommy@rochester.rr.com
Wednesday, December 12, 2012
Responsive Doubles (Part 2)
Since I am journeying to Rochester, New York for 2 weeks I need to find the cold weather gear. Rochester is the snow equivalent of Buffalo, it just avoids the publicity. For all the wonderful things that Toronto has to offer, the only thing it sends to Rochester is a snow dump as it comes over Lake Ontario. I went to Ocala yesterday shopping for one of those World War II bomber hats with sheepskin flaps but all I got was strange stares. Nothing new for me. Forget the warm clothes, just send really good scotch. Second Choice, some fur lined sandals.
Today we continue with my dialog on being a "4th seat warrior." Just to stay in focus with my current theme, in Noverber, I first discussed major suit OBAR bids (Opponents Bid and Raise the same suit) where partner has passed in-between. I noted that 2NT following this OBAR sequence is “unusual” for minors (preferably 5-5 or a strong 4 carder if 5-4). So with xx, x, KQxxx, QJxxx and 1h/p/2h, bid 2NT showing your minors. Partner picks his best minor.
In my most recent blog, I started the discussion of “Responsive Doubles” where opponents make OBAR bids in either majors or minors with an intervening take out double by partner. A double directly over opponents raise in this sequence is a Responsive Double. If it is a minor suit OBAR sequence, then the responsive double always shows 4-4 or better in the majors. When it is a major suit OBAR, there are a couple of twists depending on which major suit is bid. To cement this concept in your mind, it may be a good time to review again the preceding blog, Responsive Doubles (Part 1).
In this post I am going to discuss an OBAR sequence where partner has made an intervening standard overcall over the opening bid. Note that the only difference in this situation is partner’s overcall rather than a take out double. In all of these bids that I have discussed, just watch for the OBAR sequence by opponents, as that is the prime requirement your 4th seat intervention. Your double in this instance is said to be “responsive” to partner’s 1 spade overcall and shows 5-5 in the unbid suits. Like unusual no trump, in 4th postion it can be 5-4, but the 4 carder should be playable against 3 card support. AJTx just won’t do it.
The auction is 1h/1s/2h. Your hand is x, xx, KTxxx, QTxxx. Tell me, is this hand a piece of crap or the crown jewels? You got to see the beauty in this hand. At any vulnerability I’d be jumping up and down to double for minors. Partner is almost guaranteed to have at least 3 card support in one of the minors. Why do I know that? We know that they have an 8 card fit and when opponents have an 8 card fit it is a 93% probability that we will have an 8+ card fit as well.
You and partner need to agree on the maximum level of responsive doubles. For ease of memory some writers recommend that you and partner apply responsive doubles through the same bidding level that you use for negative doubles. What is the double if it is made beyond your agreed level? Penalty double, natch!
At the two level you don’t need much by way of hcps. It is always better to have your points primarily in your long suits and to be more aggressive when non-vulnerable. If you have doubt, it is rarely wrong to get into the bidding.
Now, in addition to our natural bids and cue bids, you have three more ways to get into the bidding after the opponents smugly “OBAR” you. Let me say this one more time, if the opponents OBAR they are showing an 8+ card suit. It is almost a mathematical certainty that they are headed for a minimum +110 if it’s a major. They are fat dumb and happy and unless opener has a game going hand, they are praying for an opportunity to play it at the 2 level. You are not supposed to be the answer to their prayers. You are supposed to be their worst nightmare.
I think some of may say “Isn’t this a balancing problem and isn’t the guy in the pass-out seat supposed to take care of that?” Can’t we just pass and blame partner for failure to balance. That a may soothe your conscience, but not get many matchpoints. Balancing in the pass-out seat has a counterpart and it is called pre-balancing. All of the bids discussed above are pre-balancing bids because they occur prior to any rebid by opener.
How do you know when to pre-balance and when to pass it around to partner to balance? One of the best guidelines is to count the cards you have in their suit. If they have 8 and we have 5 and you have only 1 of the 5, that means that partner has 4. If he has 4 cards in their suit, it is unlikely that he has a hand suited to balancing, so look at your hand again and do something. The opposite is equally true. If you got 4 cards, partner has 1 so let it roll around to him. How about those 3-2 splits. Well if I have two, I am going to try to pre-balance, since I think my chances of getting it right are better than pard’s.
Is bidding in these circumstances risky business? Sure, there is some minimal risk, but the riskiest thing you can do at match points is let opponents play the hand at the two level. If you make a responsive double what can possibly happen? Opener has three choices, redouble, bid again or pass. A redouble by opener, whatever it means in this sequence, will become meaningless since partner will bid something opposite your responsive double. If opener decides to pass, partner will also take a bid. In each instance we may find a good fit and be able to successfully compete for the hand. What if they bid again? Well, now they have to take 9 tricks instead of 8, and if they fail, we beat all those pairs that let their opponents play at the two level. On the other hand, if they bid again and make 9 tricks, it’s the same match point score whether they bid 2 or 3, and nothing is lost.
So partner responds to the responsive double. The choices are about the same as before, opponents can pass, double or bid again. They pass? I like our chances of getting a favorable board. They double? Get real, how often are opponents going to take the risky course of doubling you into game? Not very often if, and if you think not, just look at your own doubling record. Most of the time they will feel that you are robbing them of a good contract and will raise the bid to the 3 level. Well, if they do, we have everything to gain and nothing to lose. Assume they have an 8 card fit, the Law of Total Tricks states they are safe to compete to the 2 level. There is an excellent chance that a three level contract is one too many.
So take the time to learn how to be a good 4th seat Warrior. If you are not afraid to make overcalls that show only one suit, how can bids that show two alternate suits present more risk?
You may have noticed my cat Virgil at the top of my blog. I am sorry to say that we lost Virgil a couple of weeks ago. He was a Norwegian Forest Cat that we had for 15 years. He spent every waking hour wondering how he could comfort Alla and me, and simply wore himself out. What more could you ask, but we miss him.
On a Cheerier Note, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all my readers. I Promise in 2013 to make it a priority to post some kind of an index to the Blog that is more user friendly than Blogspot’s archive.
Today we continue with my dialog on being a "4th seat warrior." Just to stay in focus with my current theme, in Noverber, I first discussed major suit OBAR bids (Opponents Bid and Raise the same suit) where partner has passed in-between. I noted that 2NT following this OBAR sequence is “unusual” for minors (preferably 5-5 or a strong 4 carder if 5-4). So with xx, x, KQxxx, QJxxx and 1h/p/2h, bid 2NT showing your minors. Partner picks his best minor.
In my most recent blog, I started the discussion of “Responsive Doubles” where opponents make OBAR bids in either majors or minors with an intervening take out double by partner. A double directly over opponents raise in this sequence is a Responsive Double. If it is a minor suit OBAR sequence, then the responsive double always shows 4-4 or better in the majors. When it is a major suit OBAR, there are a couple of twists depending on which major suit is bid. To cement this concept in your mind, it may be a good time to review again the preceding blog, Responsive Doubles (Part 1).
In this post I am going to discuss an OBAR sequence where partner has made an intervening standard overcall over the opening bid. Note that the only difference in this situation is partner’s overcall rather than a take out double. In all of these bids that I have discussed, just watch for the OBAR sequence by opponents, as that is the prime requirement your 4th seat intervention. Your double in this instance is said to be “responsive” to partner’s 1 spade overcall and shows 5-5 in the unbid suits. Like unusual no trump, in 4th postion it can be 5-4, but the 4 carder should be playable against 3 card support. AJTx just won’t do it.
The auction is 1h/1s/2h. Your hand is x, xx, KTxxx, QTxxx. Tell me, is this hand a piece of crap or the crown jewels? You got to see the beauty in this hand. At any vulnerability I’d be jumping up and down to double for minors. Partner is almost guaranteed to have at least 3 card support in one of the minors. Why do I know that? We know that they have an 8 card fit and when opponents have an 8 card fit it is a 93% probability that we will have an 8+ card fit as well.
You and partner need to agree on the maximum level of responsive doubles. For ease of memory some writers recommend that you and partner apply responsive doubles through the same bidding level that you use for negative doubles. What is the double if it is made beyond your agreed level? Penalty double, natch!
At the two level you don’t need much by way of hcps. It is always better to have your points primarily in your long suits and to be more aggressive when non-vulnerable. If you have doubt, it is rarely wrong to get into the bidding.
Now, in addition to our natural bids and cue bids, you have three more ways to get into the bidding after the opponents smugly “OBAR” you. Let me say this one more time, if the opponents OBAR they are showing an 8+ card suit. It is almost a mathematical certainty that they are headed for a minimum +110 if it’s a major. They are fat dumb and happy and unless opener has a game going hand, they are praying for an opportunity to play it at the 2 level. You are not supposed to be the answer to their prayers. You are supposed to be their worst nightmare.
I think some of may say “Isn’t this a balancing problem and isn’t the guy in the pass-out seat supposed to take care of that?” Can’t we just pass and blame partner for failure to balance. That a may soothe your conscience, but not get many matchpoints. Balancing in the pass-out seat has a counterpart and it is called pre-balancing. All of the bids discussed above are pre-balancing bids because they occur prior to any rebid by opener.
How do you know when to pre-balance and when to pass it around to partner to balance? One of the best guidelines is to count the cards you have in their suit. If they have 8 and we have 5 and you have only 1 of the 5, that means that partner has 4. If he has 4 cards in their suit, it is unlikely that he has a hand suited to balancing, so look at your hand again and do something. The opposite is equally true. If you got 4 cards, partner has 1 so let it roll around to him. How about those 3-2 splits. Well if I have two, I am going to try to pre-balance, since I think my chances of getting it right are better than pard’s.
Is bidding in these circumstances risky business? Sure, there is some minimal risk, but the riskiest thing you can do at match points is let opponents play the hand at the two level. If you make a responsive double what can possibly happen? Opener has three choices, redouble, bid again or pass. A redouble by opener, whatever it means in this sequence, will become meaningless since partner will bid something opposite your responsive double. If opener decides to pass, partner will also take a bid. In each instance we may find a good fit and be able to successfully compete for the hand. What if they bid again? Well, now they have to take 9 tricks instead of 8, and if they fail, we beat all those pairs that let their opponents play at the two level. On the other hand, if they bid again and make 9 tricks, it’s the same match point score whether they bid 2 or 3, and nothing is lost.
So partner responds to the responsive double. The choices are about the same as before, opponents can pass, double or bid again. They pass? I like our chances of getting a favorable board. They double? Get real, how often are opponents going to take the risky course of doubling you into game? Not very often if, and if you think not, just look at your own doubling record. Most of the time they will feel that you are robbing them of a good contract and will raise the bid to the 3 level. Well, if they do, we have everything to gain and nothing to lose. Assume they have an 8 card fit, the Law of Total Tricks states they are safe to compete to the 2 level. There is an excellent chance that a three level contract is one too many.
So take the time to learn how to be a good 4th seat Warrior. If you are not afraid to make overcalls that show only one suit, how can bids that show two alternate suits present more risk?
You may have noticed my cat Virgil at the top of my blog. I am sorry to say that we lost Virgil a couple of weeks ago. He was a Norwegian Forest Cat that we had for 15 years. He spent every waking hour wondering how he could comfort Alla and me, and simply wore himself out. What more could you ask, but we miss him.
On a Cheerier Note, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all my readers. I Promise in 2013 to make it a priority to post some kind of an index to the Blog that is more user friendly than Blogspot’s archive.
Saturday, November 24, 2012
Responsive Doubles (Part 1)
Well, Thanksgiving has come and gone and without a doubt I have a lot to be thankful for, mostly surviving a number of these holidays. Actually I am tied with Willie Nelson, but I am worried his “Grass” consumption will give him an edge in the end. Anyway, it was not the big event of the week, I am really celebrating my reinstatement as a Notary Public as decreed by the Legislature, Governor and Secretary of State of the Great State of Florida.
This is good news for all my unmarried readers or the great pretenders. If you are contemplating marriage, or maybe just a rehearsal, you can come to Florida for my winter special. My big extravaganza is poolside ceremonies, but also offer palm tree or golf course venues. All Florida requires is a license ($93.50 on your Visa) and my only requirement is a certification of competency from your psychiatrist. If you are ambivalent, I also do “no license marriages”, since the Holiday Inn down the road has a “Don’t ask, Don’t Tell” policy. Same Don Ho Music, Champagne toast and Ice Carving.
Like many of my blog post, this one is directed to the “duplicate wars.” You can teach uncontested bidding in a week, but it takes a lifetime to understand how to effectively interfere in competitive auctions. Many of the competing opportunities come up in auctions where “Opponents Bid And Raise” the same suit. Marty Bergen uses the acronym OBAR to generically describe these auctions. Most often it is 1major/2major, but can also be in the minors. In this discussion your partner has competed over the opening bid with a Take Out Double. Thus you are sitting behind RHO who has raised to the two level. It’s now or never and you need to take never out of your vocabulary. Not to be lost in this discussion is that partner having made a take out double has a real opening hand.
In my last blog post, we looked at the 1h/2h OBAR sequence where partner had passed in-between the bids. With xxx, x, AQxxx, KJxx (non-vul, 10 hcps and 2 quick tricks) I advocated the call of 2NT to be Unusual No Trump showing minors and a desire to compete. Yes, I am forcing partner to the 3 level but with decent shape and hand strength it is the right call. We are favorites to have at least half the points and maybe more.
Today, we are going to stay with OBAR sequences, but change the facts so that partner makes a Take Out Double over the opening bid. Assume first that the OBAR sequence is in either minor, say 1c/x/2c, and as advancer you hold xxxx, Jxxx, AKx, xx. It looks like you have a major fit somewhere, but how can you explore it with only 8 hcps. Partner by his double has announced shortness in clubs, so presumably he has at least one 4 card major. You really don’t care which major and with this minimal hand you do not want to take two bids, so you need a bid that says “pick a major partner.” Actually we do have a bidding card for that, it is red with an X, and in this sequence is called a Responsive Double. The quality of my majors is lousy, but my hand is plenty strong for this action. In discussing Responsive Doubles, Karen Walker (a Bulletin Columnist) says you need only 6-7 points since in this auction partner is still able to bid at the 2 level. Responsive doubles have a lot in common with Negative Doubles, just in a different seat and several commentators recommend that you play them through the same level as you play negative doubles to make it easy to remember.
The other OBAR auction is 1major/2major. Again partner makes an intervening Take Out Double. Let's say it is 1h/x/2h/. Partner, for his take out double, hopefully has a heart shortage, likely 4 spades and tolerable support for the other 2 suits. Let’s assumes you hold Qxx, xx, AKxx. JTxx. A Responsive Double on this hand runs the risk that partner will respond in spades with his 4 card suit. You want to restrict his choice to minors so we don’t end up declaring with a 7 card spade suit. The best practice is that if you have 4 spades, you bid 2 spades to show them. If you fail to bid 2 spades and instead make a Responsive Double, the take out doubler assumes you have minors. So with the above hand you make a Responsive Double asking partner to bid his 4+ card minor. In this case you are forcing partner to bid at the 3 level with the Responsive Double, so you need more stuff to enter the auction, but 8 or 10 working points are sufficient. We want to challenge the commitment of opponents with a 3 level minor suit bid. In this case the Responsive Double asks “pick a minor partner.”
If the major suit auction is 1s/x/2s, bidding 3 hearts to show a 4+ card heart suit is not as easy, since to do so at the 3 level requires at least a good limit raise. In spite of the fact that partner’s take out double of spades strongly suggests 4 hearts, if you have fewer than 10-12 working points you will be misleading partner and be in 4 hearts before you can catch your breath. Max Hardy, a fallen hero of mine, suggests that the way to slow down this auction is to make a Responsive Double asking partner to pick a minor. When he picks a minor you now rebid 3 hearts to show him you have hearts, but not enough in values to make a 3 heart call over 2 spades.
Responsive Doubles are vastly under used in today’s competitive auctions. If everybody who has them checked on their convention card knew how to use them, we would hear of them more often. Her are some simple guidelines:
Responsive Double after Minor suit OBAR
1. A minor suit OBAR auction by opponents with an intervening take out double by partner.
2. To make a responsive double, you need 6-7 points and 4 cards in both majors.
3. Take out doubler picks a major and all hands rest (hopefully).
4. If the Responsive Doubler takes a second call after the Responsive Double it is definitely game invitational.
Responsive Double after Major Suit OBAR
1. A Major Suit OBAR by opponents with an intervening take out double by partner.
2. If you make a Responsive Double it will ask partner to pick a minor.
3. Alternatively if you bid hearts at the 3 level as suggested by the take out double, it show a good invitational hand with 4+ hearts.
4. If you have 4+ hearts but less than limit raise values, make a Responsive Double first asking partner to pick a minor. When he bids a minor you now bid 3 hearts to show a minimal hand with 4 hearts that could not bid hearts directly over 2 spades. This warns partner of your more limited values and should slow the auction way down.
Look for opportunities to make a Responsive Double when you hear 1y/x/2y. You are telling partner to pick a suit and you save a level of bidding. Remember the risk is always in not acting after an OBAR sequence. Pass is for “newbies”, not for bridge warriors and winners.
The next post will continue to deal with OBAR sequences, but instead of making a take out double, partner makes an overcall. The responsive double will continue to serve us in this bidding sequence, but some of the meanings change. Comments and Questions directly to tsolberg@tampabay.rr.com .
This is good news for all my unmarried readers or the great pretenders. If you are contemplating marriage, or maybe just a rehearsal, you can come to Florida for my winter special. My big extravaganza is poolside ceremonies, but also offer palm tree or golf course venues. All Florida requires is a license ($93.50 on your Visa) and my only requirement is a certification of competency from your psychiatrist. If you are ambivalent, I also do “no license marriages”, since the Holiday Inn down the road has a “Don’t ask, Don’t Tell” policy. Same Don Ho Music, Champagne toast and Ice Carving.
Like many of my blog post, this one is directed to the “duplicate wars.” You can teach uncontested bidding in a week, but it takes a lifetime to understand how to effectively interfere in competitive auctions. Many of the competing opportunities come up in auctions where “Opponents Bid And Raise” the same suit. Marty Bergen uses the acronym OBAR to generically describe these auctions. Most often it is 1major/2major, but can also be in the minors. In this discussion your partner has competed over the opening bid with a Take Out Double. Thus you are sitting behind RHO who has raised to the two level. It’s now or never and you need to take never out of your vocabulary. Not to be lost in this discussion is that partner having made a take out double has a real opening hand.
In my last blog post, we looked at the 1h/2h OBAR sequence where partner had passed in-between the bids. With xxx, x, AQxxx, KJxx (non-vul, 10 hcps and 2 quick tricks) I advocated the call of 2NT to be Unusual No Trump showing minors and a desire to compete. Yes, I am forcing partner to the 3 level but with decent shape and hand strength it is the right call. We are favorites to have at least half the points and maybe more.
Today, we are going to stay with OBAR sequences, but change the facts so that partner makes a Take Out Double over the opening bid. Assume first that the OBAR sequence is in either minor, say 1c/x/2c, and as advancer you hold xxxx, Jxxx, AKx, xx. It looks like you have a major fit somewhere, but how can you explore it with only 8 hcps. Partner by his double has announced shortness in clubs, so presumably he has at least one 4 card major. You really don’t care which major and with this minimal hand you do not want to take two bids, so you need a bid that says “pick a major partner.” Actually we do have a bidding card for that, it is red with an X, and in this sequence is called a Responsive Double. The quality of my majors is lousy, but my hand is plenty strong for this action. In discussing Responsive Doubles, Karen Walker (a Bulletin Columnist) says you need only 6-7 points since in this auction partner is still able to bid at the 2 level. Responsive doubles have a lot in common with Negative Doubles, just in a different seat and several commentators recommend that you play them through the same level as you play negative doubles to make it easy to remember.
The other OBAR auction is 1major/2major. Again partner makes an intervening Take Out Double. Let's say it is 1h/x/2h/. Partner, for his take out double, hopefully has a heart shortage, likely 4 spades and tolerable support for the other 2 suits. Let’s assumes you hold Qxx, xx, AKxx. JTxx. A Responsive Double on this hand runs the risk that partner will respond in spades with his 4 card suit. You want to restrict his choice to minors so we don’t end up declaring with a 7 card spade suit. The best practice is that if you have 4 spades, you bid 2 spades to show them. If you fail to bid 2 spades and instead make a Responsive Double, the take out doubler assumes you have minors. So with the above hand you make a Responsive Double asking partner to bid his 4+ card minor. In this case you are forcing partner to bid at the 3 level with the Responsive Double, so you need more stuff to enter the auction, but 8 or 10 working points are sufficient. We want to challenge the commitment of opponents with a 3 level minor suit bid. In this case the Responsive Double asks “pick a minor partner.”
If the major suit auction is 1s/x/2s, bidding 3 hearts to show a 4+ card heart suit is not as easy, since to do so at the 3 level requires at least a good limit raise. In spite of the fact that partner’s take out double of spades strongly suggests 4 hearts, if you have fewer than 10-12 working points you will be misleading partner and be in 4 hearts before you can catch your breath. Max Hardy, a fallen hero of mine, suggests that the way to slow down this auction is to make a Responsive Double asking partner to pick a minor. When he picks a minor you now rebid 3 hearts to show him you have hearts, but not enough in values to make a 3 heart call over 2 spades.
Responsive Doubles are vastly under used in today’s competitive auctions. If everybody who has them checked on their convention card knew how to use them, we would hear of them more often. Her are some simple guidelines:
Responsive Double after Minor suit OBAR
1. A minor suit OBAR auction by opponents with an intervening take out double by partner.
2. To make a responsive double, you need 6-7 points and 4 cards in both majors.
3. Take out doubler picks a major and all hands rest (hopefully).
4. If the Responsive Doubler takes a second call after the Responsive Double it is definitely game invitational.
Responsive Double after Major Suit OBAR
1. A Major Suit OBAR by opponents with an intervening take out double by partner.
2. If you make a Responsive Double it will ask partner to pick a minor.
3. Alternatively if you bid hearts at the 3 level as suggested by the take out double, it show a good invitational hand with 4+ hearts.
4. If you have 4+ hearts but less than limit raise values, make a Responsive Double first asking partner to pick a minor. When he bids a minor you now bid 3 hearts to show a minimal hand with 4 hearts that could not bid hearts directly over 2 spades. This warns partner of your more limited values and should slow the auction way down.
Look for opportunities to make a Responsive Double when you hear 1y/x/2y. You are telling partner to pick a suit and you save a level of bidding. Remember the risk is always in not acting after an OBAR sequence. Pass is for “newbies”, not for bridge warriors and winners.
The next post will continue to deal with OBAR sequences, but instead of making a take out double, partner makes an overcall. The responsive double will continue to serve us in this bidding sequence, but some of the meanings change. Comments and Questions directly to tsolberg@tampabay.rr.com .
Sunday, November 18, 2012
Bidding Unusual 2 No Trump with a "Spanx" Crises
Knowing that I am an unrelenting “fashionista”, I overheard my friend, Dick Ragatz mention that the latest rage in the Men’s department is “Spanx.” If you don’t know what they are then you must have a perfect body. Think about cut off panty hose. Strolling through Dillard’s men’s department, I spotted a rack full of them. I think you can guess the rest. Knowing that this was new territory (at least that is my story), I consulted my wife Alla on how to keep them from riding down like cheap panty hose. She said tuck your shirt tails under the Spanx.
Full of renewed confidence I decided the perfect place for a practice run was the Friday Bridge game in Hernando. To add a little courage, I decided having a beer on the way to the game would be a good idea on the theory that nothing can hurt my bridge game. It can’t be much more than the third set of boards when my aging bladder started to send signals. I rushed to the men’s room to find that the only way to get through three layers was “drop trou” and sit down. Now I am a stand up guy and relentlessly adaptable to new solutions, so I grabbed some scissors from my infamous “black bag” and cut a nice 6 inch arc out of the front of the hem of my golf shirt. The good news is that the problem was solved. The bad news is that I have a curious hole in the front of my $125 golf shirt. So if you see me wearing a red shirt, you will know that it is a Spanx day. If you see me tugging at my waist, please don’t pull the alert card.
One problem solved, will the rest of the day be flawless? Oh hell no. I am on some of my best behavior closely adhering to bidding standards as set forth in our 40 page bidding agreement: Bang, I am in 4th seat non-vul vs. vul and dealt something like xxx, x, AQxxx, KJxx. The bidding goes 1h/p/2h/2NT. I think this bid cannot be misunderstood, but admit it has not been recently (possibly never) discussed. My partner is an unrelenting purist and anything that is not discussed in the past 20 minutes has the meaning ascribed to it by Charles Goren in 1948. I, on the other hand, am more of an innovator in the style of Marty Bergen. As someone is sure to say, “Sir, you are no Marty Bergen.” Fortunately, we are still smiling and partners after the opponents ran the first 9 tricks in the majors. Nothing like an undiscussed bid to punch a hole in your game.
OK, who is right? Well, both of us. My partner because he is entitled to be consumed iny his time warp, and your blogger since modern bridge long ago changed the default of the 2 No Trump in this sequence to Unusual No Trump for minors. My hero, Larry Cohen, in a recent free news letter discusses the many facets of Unusual No Trump. Here are some of his guidelines:
1. In the direct seat most often it is a weakish preemptive hand showing the two lowest unbid suits with decent suit quality and 5+/5+ length. If vulnerable, the suit quality should move from decent to good. If preemptive, the bidder intends to pass any preference shown by his partner. If the hand is a really good hand (17+), the intention would be to a make a second bid showing these values. If the hand falls in between preemptive and really good (the so-called in-between hand) you need an agreement with partner whether to use Unusual No Trump or, alternatively to try bid both suits. There are adherents to both styles.
2. In the direct seat 2 NT is Unusual if opponent opened 1c, 1d, 1h, 1s, 1NT or 2c. The last two opening bids may surprise you since they occur so rarely
3. If partner is a passed hand, his bid of 2NT after his initial pass call is still Unusual 2NT. e.g. p/p/1c/p/2c/2NT (diamonds and hearts).
4. If opponents bid and raise any suit, e.g. 1h/p/2h/2NT, that is unusual no trump. If the bid and raised suit is a minor, the unusual 2NT guarantees at least 4 cards in each major.
5. Conversely, if the 2NT bidder is in the “reopening seat” 1d/p/p/2NT, that is the traditional 2NT reopening abid and shows a balanced hand with a stopper and 18-20 hcps.
6. How about the sequence ? 1x/p/1y/2NT. Unless you have some contrary bidding agreement (as we do) it should be treated as Unusual.
7. What if your LHO doubles your Unusual No Trump bid. 1h/2NT/x or 1h/p/2h/2NT/x. A pass should show equal length and substantially equivalent quality in both unusual suits and bidding either suit over the double should show a preference. A redouble can have any value you assign to it. Perhaps a hand with stoppers and some support fot the indicated suits, looking for No Trump. Your call.
The final issue is how long the two suits need to be. In the direct seat I prefer staying with the traditional 5+/5+. This reflects my general preference for disciplined bids so as to increase the quality of the information passed to partner. My fundamental belief is that the more discrete you make your bids and responses, the better the exchange of information and hence result. If your partnership permits 5-4 or 6-4 hands, it’s a choice of style, obviously not mine.
In the OBAR sequence (opponents bid and raise) with a 4th seat 2NT bid, it doesn’t bother me that the Unusual No Trump bidder has 5-4. If you look at the probabilities, opponents have an 8+ card suit and the odds are 93% that we also have an 8+ card suit. If we do nothing, they are well protected by the Law of Total Tricks and we will never find our competing suit. If they take another bid, good, they are one level higher. If they don’t take another bid we very likely will find an 8 or 9 card suit to compete in.
Was it an “unusual” day in the trenches? Definitely unusual for me, but then most are!!! Comments to tsolberg@tampabay.rr.com .
Full of renewed confidence I decided the perfect place for a practice run was the Friday Bridge game in Hernando. To add a little courage, I decided having a beer on the way to the game would be a good idea on the theory that nothing can hurt my bridge game. It can’t be much more than the third set of boards when my aging bladder started to send signals. I rushed to the men’s room to find that the only way to get through three layers was “drop trou” and sit down. Now I am a stand up guy and relentlessly adaptable to new solutions, so I grabbed some scissors from my infamous “black bag” and cut a nice 6 inch arc out of the front of the hem of my golf shirt. The good news is that the problem was solved. The bad news is that I have a curious hole in the front of my $125 golf shirt. So if you see me wearing a red shirt, you will know that it is a Spanx day. If you see me tugging at my waist, please don’t pull the alert card.
One problem solved, will the rest of the day be flawless? Oh hell no. I am on some of my best behavior closely adhering to bidding standards as set forth in our 40 page bidding agreement: Bang, I am in 4th seat non-vul vs. vul and dealt something like xxx, x, AQxxx, KJxx. The bidding goes 1h/p/2h/2NT. I think this bid cannot be misunderstood, but admit it has not been recently (possibly never) discussed. My partner is an unrelenting purist and anything that is not discussed in the past 20 minutes has the meaning ascribed to it by Charles Goren in 1948. I, on the other hand, am more of an innovator in the style of Marty Bergen. As someone is sure to say, “Sir, you are no Marty Bergen.” Fortunately, we are still smiling and partners after the opponents ran the first 9 tricks in the majors. Nothing like an undiscussed bid to punch a hole in your game.
OK, who is right? Well, both of us. My partner because he is entitled to be consumed iny his time warp, and your blogger since modern bridge long ago changed the default of the 2 No Trump in this sequence to Unusual No Trump for minors. My hero, Larry Cohen, in a recent free news letter discusses the many facets of Unusual No Trump. Here are some of his guidelines:
1. In the direct seat most often it is a weakish preemptive hand showing the two lowest unbid suits with decent suit quality and 5+/5+ length. If vulnerable, the suit quality should move from decent to good. If preemptive, the bidder intends to pass any preference shown by his partner. If the hand is a really good hand (17+), the intention would be to a make a second bid showing these values. If the hand falls in between preemptive and really good (the so-called in-between hand) you need an agreement with partner whether to use Unusual No Trump or, alternatively to try bid both suits. There are adherents to both styles.
2. In the direct seat 2 NT is Unusual if opponent opened 1c, 1d, 1h, 1s, 1NT or 2c. The last two opening bids may surprise you since they occur so rarely
3. If partner is a passed hand, his bid of 2NT after his initial pass call is still Unusual 2NT. e.g. p/p/1c/p/2c/2NT (diamonds and hearts).
4. If opponents bid and raise any suit, e.g. 1h/p/2h/2NT, that is unusual no trump. If the bid and raised suit is a minor, the unusual 2NT guarantees at least 4 cards in each major.
5. Conversely, if the 2NT bidder is in the “reopening seat” 1d/p/p/2NT, that is the traditional 2NT reopening abid and shows a balanced hand with a stopper and 18-20 hcps.
6. How about the sequence ? 1x/p/1y/2NT. Unless you have some contrary bidding agreement (as we do) it should be treated as Unusual.
7. What if your LHO doubles your Unusual No Trump bid. 1h/2NT/x or 1h/p/2h/2NT/x. A pass should show equal length and substantially equivalent quality in both unusual suits and bidding either suit over the double should show a preference. A redouble can have any value you assign to it. Perhaps a hand with stoppers and some support fot the indicated suits, looking for No Trump. Your call.
The final issue is how long the two suits need to be. In the direct seat I prefer staying with the traditional 5+/5+. This reflects my general preference for disciplined bids so as to increase the quality of the information passed to partner. My fundamental belief is that the more discrete you make your bids and responses, the better the exchange of information and hence result. If your partnership permits 5-4 or 6-4 hands, it’s a choice of style, obviously not mine.
In the OBAR sequence (opponents bid and raise) with a 4th seat 2NT bid, it doesn’t bother me that the Unusual No Trump bidder has 5-4. If you look at the probabilities, opponents have an 8+ card suit and the odds are 93% that we also have an 8+ card suit. If we do nothing, they are well protected by the Law of Total Tricks and we will never find our competing suit. If they take another bid, good, they are one level higher. If they don’t take another bid we very likely will find an 8 or 9 card suit to compete in.
Was it an “unusual” day in the trenches? Definitely unusual for me, but then most are!!! Comments to tsolberg@tampabay.rr.com .
Sunday, August 19, 2012
Some Days All You Get is an Intersting Hand!
Some Days All You Get
is an Interesting Hand
As time keeps nibbling at your memory and focus, the results tell the story. So it is for me, and all I get many days are interesting hands to ponder. If you are able to retain your brilliant and clever partners through these tribulations, you also get reminded along the way of how fortunate you really are to hang onto them.
If I had to judge last Friday by the result, I would have to
say that it wasn’t even worth $1.50, but Board 27 provided both several bidding
options as well as a platform for my partner, Mike Spitulnik, to demonstrate
his declaring skills which are highly regarded here in our little Rochester
bridge community. Here is the hand rotated to show South as the declarer. None
vulnerable and West, as dealer, passes. Now it is up to North!
********* AQ94
*********void*********AQT76
********* AJ87
8*******************J32
K743***************T986KJ543**************98
QT9****************K652
*********2
*********43
I am sitting North and have to make a decision, stay in
tempo and try to salvage something from the day. I never really counted points
on this hand, just calculated Losing Trick Count (LTC) and the Quick Tricks
(QT). I remember my excellent Florida mentor, Pat Peterson, telling me about
the 4+4 Rule. This bidding guideline says that you can open a hand with 2 clubs
if you have four LTC and four QT’s. Playing rules always provide a good defense
in the post mortems, so I opened 2 clubs. I felt comfortable with this because I
never counted hcps nor considered what I was going to say as my dummy only came
down with only 17. I am sure most opened my hand 1 diamond. Perhaps double dummy
you can reach a spade slam, but 10 out of 14 failed. If you choose that route I
think it needs to go 1d/1s/4h (splinter). This does not look good from South’s
position since there are 7 hcps of duplication in hearts and good bridge says
to bid 4 spades.
Mike and I were playing “2 diamonds waiting” so his hand is
worth a positive bid and he correctly bid 2 spades so he could bid two hearts
later if necessary and not take up unnecessary bidding space in a game force
auction. With a heart void and no prior agreement of how to show it in our 1430
system, I decided that I wanted to control the hand from my side so I set the
trump suit by bidding 3 spades. As Robert Burns wrote “The best laid plans of mice
and men oft go awry.” Mike’s next bid was not 4 spades but rather 4 NT! In
retrospect, I think he was justified in assuming “Captaincy” since I had already
shown my hand and values and his hand was still unlimited. Now I am right where
I did not want to be. How do you show a void when partner launches into key
card not knowing you have one?
My friend and expert, Eddie Kantar, explains it this way:
(i) 5NT shows 0 or 2 keycards and a void somewhere.(ii) 6 clubs shows 1 or 3 key cards and a club void.
(iii) 6 diamonds shows 1 or 3 keys and a diamond void.
(iv) 6 hearts shows 1 or 3 keys plus a void in hearts.
(v) 6 of the agreed suit shows 1 or 3 and a void in a higher ranking suit.
Another approach to bidding Mike’s hand would be to ignore
the key card ask entirely. I am suggesting something called the “Grand Slam
Force” invented by Josephine Culbertson about 80 years ago, but still in the
bidding vocabulary of experts. I have used this twice in my life and both times
in the same afternoon. After I bid 3 spades setting the trump, a bid of 5NT
asks partner to bid a grand slam with two of the top three honors in the trump
suit, and otherwise bid a small slam. This is my chance to bid 7 spades! How
can you justify foregoing a key card ask only to show the grand eloquence of
your bidding style. Easy, partner did open 2 clubs and hopefully he has the
values (hcps and/or distribution) to support it.
In real life, Mike was not going to give me the chance to
"f-bomb" this up. After I showed 3 key cards Mike bid 7 spades in an effort to
reclaim full benefit for his entry fee. With 14 tables, 2 played a small slam,
we played a grand and the rest stopped at game. Mike was the only declarer to
make 13 tricks which, according to the computer, can be made against any lead and from either side.
Our opponent led the 8 of spades and who can blame her. Looking only at the N-S
hands, see if you can do it. Did I not tell you my partner is clever! He is so
modest he probably has already crawled under his desk.
Can I claim anything for myself? Well, blogger’s are not
supposed to be self-aggrandizers, but in retrospect I think Pat Peterson’s
playing rule led me to the best opening bid. First, Mike was assured that I had
no more than 4 LTC. Since we have a fit, the LTC formula should apply. Since he
has 6 LTC, we have together 10 LTC. To determine the number of tricks we are
likely to take subtract the losing trick count from 24 or 24-10=14, a Grand
with an overtrick yet! The 4 QT requirement assures him that this is not just
some long suit, but rather I have some outside stuff as well.
How did we get catapulted into seven spades? Well we knew
the hcp requirement was a number ending in 7, and in end result we found out
that 27 seems to work as well as 37. Remember, this is discussion, not dogma,
and as long as you bid and make 7 spades, do it your way.
Tuesday, July 24, 2012
This Fiish Will Bite on Anything!
I was salivating over a 3 NT contract last week at the
Wednesday game at Temple Beth El. I could see that everyone would be in 3NT, so
I dedicated myself to getting that extra trick that must be lurking somewhere
in this computer generated hand. Here are the N-S hands:
North
AJ97KJ
AKQ94
J9
South
Q63
A96
32
AT532
The opening lead from West was the heart 3, I put in the J and it held. I knew that the odds of the diamond suit splitting 3-3 were about 35% and the 4-2 break was 48%. The true odds of running diamonds from the top was about 39% since the JT doubleton in either hand would also work holding the 9 of diamonds. If I get lucky and run 5 diamond tricks, maybe somebody will discard a spade and help me out.
I started with the Ace of diamonds and I see Greg Giles, who is sitting East, smoothly play the Jack of diamonds. Greg was someone I did not know, but his face was totally innocent, so I credited him with a stiff Jack and decided to go after West’s ten that was bracketed by my Q-9. I came back to my hand and led the 3 toward my Q-9 tenace and see Greg taking my trick with the 10 of diamonds. Did he start with the JT? Oh no, worse than that, he had played the J from JT5 and I went for it like a rat to cheese!
While clearing my head, I hear a loud roar of laughter at
the table. I am about to lecture my opponent for gloating and look across the
table and see it is my partner Jim Bailey who is laughing telling me I got
suckered by a clever false card. Well, at this point I am thinking that if I
have to go down, there is nobody else I would rather take with me than Jim.
It is all very humiliating: Here I am the Prince of Probabilities being taken down like a novice. Still licking my wounds in the aftermath, and clinging to a faint hope that I can patch up my reputation, I turn to the Encyclopedia of Bridge looking under suit combinations. Sure enough, I found the exact card holding with the following play advice:
1. For 5 Tricks play the top honors hoping that the Jack and
Ten drop in 3 rounds. It is a 39% probability.
2. For 4 Tricks (a safety play) start by leading small to
the 9 in case East is void or has a single that is lower than the 9. This play will
take 4 tricks 90% of the time.
3. When playing against players who are not devious and
unlikely to false card the Jack when holding JTx, cash the Ace and if you
see an honor drop from East, finesse the 9 on the next play.
So my claim is that I did not make a mistake or get
suckered, I just misjudged Greg’s character. He is in fact a deceiver and a
ruthless one at that. How did it all work out? We got a zero on the board, but
I was able to swallow my pride and recover for a high finish. The moral of this
story is never trust an innocent face. Or better yet, just mindlessly lay down
the top 3 honors no matter what you see.
If I substitute the ten on the board in place of the nine, should you now finesse the ten or play the diamond honors from the top? I don’t have to look in the Encyclopedia of Bridge to know that finesse is a 50% probability, so at first blush it looks like the finesse is the percentage play. But wait, adding the 10 in place of the 9 changes everything, since the Jack becomes a significant card. No defender would play the Jack from Jx since it would give declarer the whole suit, and this changes the odds on the 3-3 break from 39% to 52%. Thus, playing the honors from the top is 2% superior to taking the finesse. For those who want the mathematical explanation of these phenomena, see my blog post of September 23, 2007 entitled “The Odds and Ends of Bridge (Post Graduate Course).”
If I substitute the ten on the board in place of the nine, should you now finesse the ten or play the diamond honors from the top? I don’t have to look in the Encyclopedia of Bridge to know that finesse is a 50% probability, so at first blush it looks like the finesse is the percentage play. But wait, adding the 10 in place of the 9 changes everything, since the Jack becomes a significant card. No defender would play the Jack from Jx since it would give declarer the whole suit, and this changes the odds on the 3-3 break from 39% to 52%. Thus, playing the honors from the top is 2% superior to taking the finesse. For those who want the mathematical explanation of these phenomena, see my blog post of September 23, 2007 entitled “The Odds and Ends of Bridge (Post Graduate Course).”
Will all of this convince Jim Bailey that I am not a fish? Absolutely not, so perhaps I should just admit that I got bamboozled by an innocent face. A pretty face works equally as well, so powder your nose ladies.
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